Yay!

I’ve been going through a hard time in my life. Within the space of about six months, I’ve had 3 seriously ill cousins, my grandfather passed away, I got really sick, I injured my back during a bad training session, and I’ve been having some problems with my job. This is supposed to be the best time of year, though: my birthday is tomorrow, and the holiday season is about to get in full swing. Nevertheless, I’ve been feeling really down, so it was nice to get this DailyOm:

Positivity Revisited
Keeping A Diary With Purpose
A diary can play many roles. It can be a confidant, a vehicle of self expression, a tool that facilitates clarity of thought, or a repository of dreams. A diary can also be a powerful source of comfort during challenging or traumatic periods. When you record those insights and incidents that clearly demonstrate you are on the right track, you can return to your words days, weeks, or months later and find uniquely soothing reassurance. A diary with a specific purpose can be a good tool for keeping track of experiences before the passage of time can skew your perception of events. It reflects the immediacy of your life and thus provides you with a landmark to return to when you begin to doubt yourself. If doubt does arise, simply open your diary to reaffirm your experiences. The confidence, surety, passion, and bravery you felt in a single moment is preserved, giving you a means to recapture those feelings in any place, at any time.Your diary serves as a repository of personalized encouragement. Since a diary is, by its very nature, as individual as you are, you should give some thought to the type of diary that will serve you best. A synchronicity-and-connections diary might describe those instances where seemingly random occurrences came together in a meaningful way, propelling you forward. Or you may find strength in the pages of a pride diary that makes note not only of those times you felt proud of yourself but also precisely why you were pleased with your efforts. And a cause-and-effect diary can help you become more decisive by reminding you of all the wise, life-affirming choices you have made. Your diary should be small enough to be readily portable and on hand whenever possible because the faster you put your thoughts down on paper, the more authentic your declarations are apt to be.

Regardless of the type of focused diary you choose to keep, your recollections will create a positive feedback loop that helps you cope with doubt in a constructive way. Reading through your diary when life seems uncertain can show you that your misgivings are unfounded. As you draw consolation from your uplifting words, you will know without a doubt that you are indeed living your purpose and following the path that you committed to before birth.

As I’m sure you know, Valley of Silence is the third and final book in Nora Roberts’s Circle Trilogy. I actually read it when it came out on Halloween, but I’m just now getting around to writing about it. So, here’s my take: it was kind of meh. Don’t get me wrong; I enjoyed it, both because I really like Nora Roberts and because I wanted to know how the story would end. But it took me longer than usual to get through it. The beginning moved slowly; it was all build up, build up, build up…and then the battle was over in just a couple of pages. Also, the outcome was fairly predictable: not only did I know who would win, but I also knew all along whe the "old man" narrator was. The romantic aspects of the book were fine, if few and far between, but I did get tired of the inner battles that both Moira and Cian were facing. Yes, we love each other, but I’m a queen and you’re a vampire…yawn. I guess I just thought this book would be more fast-paced and fiery. Overall, it was solid, and I’m glad I read it, but I think Roberts has done better. On the plus side, I always enjoy it when Roberts delves into the fantastic, and I really like the vampire bent of the story.

Fiona Apple, The First Taste

I lie in an early bed, thinking late thoughts
Waiting for the black to replace my blue
I do not struggle in your web, because it was my aim to get caught
But daddy longlegs, I feel
That I am finally growing weary
Of waiting to be consumed by youGive me the first taste, let it begin
Heaven cannot wait forever
Darling, just start the chase
I’ll let you win
But you must make the endeavor

Oh, your love give me a heart contusion
Adagio breezes fill my skin with sudden red
Your hungry flirt borders intrusion
I’m building memories on things we have not said
Full is not heavy as empty, not nearly my love, not nearly my love, not nearly

Give me the first taste
Let it begin
Heaven cannot wait forever
Darling, just start the chase
I’ll let you win
But you must make the endeavor

Today I’m debuting a new category on themodernista: artbeat. This category will be for discussing art, reviewing art,  looking at artist’s bios, and occasionally debuting my own work, when I feel I’ve done something worthwhile. Today’s feature is Hylas and the Nymphs by John William Waterhouse. I’ve loved this work ever since I was a child and stumbled upon it in a Greek mythology encyclopedia. Years later, while I was at college, there was a little vendor at the student union selling prints, and I managed to pick up a copy. It’s small, but beautifully matted and framed, and currently on display in my living room. All of Waterhouse’s works have this beautiful, dreamy quality; to me his work is visual poetry. If you’re not familiar with his work, I highly suggest you check it out and then come back and let me know what you think.